The Big Easy Rollergirls

"It costs a lot of money to look this CHEAP!" Dolly Parton



My very first recollection of CHEAP THR!LL was filtered with a warped sense of camaraderie. “Wow,” I thought the first time I saw her, “she bought the same crappy skates that I did.” Like most, I had not been on skates since I was twelve, and was ignorant to the importance of such things as wheel, trucks, bearings, etc. I purchased the first pair of skates I found at a sporting goods store, and did they suck. It wasn’t until I actually upgraded into new skates that I discovered the true worth of using the right kind of equipment. I pointed this out to CHEAP, “I know,” she said, with an intent look on her face, “but these were the only ones I could afford. I’m saving up for a better pair.” It was an expression that I would become accustomed to seeing on her-one of resolution and grit.



CHEAP, like many others who first joined The Big Easy Rollergirls, was not the most proficient skater. Like everyone else, she struggled through cross-overs, maintaining her center of gravity and skating low, but unlike some, CHEAP skated non-stop. Her skills exploded! She kept posting on the BERG board for “free skates” at Airline Skate Center and skates in the park. At the time, The Big Easy Rollergirls were on their third wave of skaters. Katrina wiped out the first batch. The inaugural meeting where it was announced, “This is going to be a lot of work; it’s more than skating and looking good” wiped out the second batch. Those who had been in it since the beginning were getting tired; CHEAP injected a new brand of jubilance into the league. In a group of unknowns, CHEAP brought people together, whether it be for lunch after practice, swimming at her apartment complex, or skate practices on the side; she was always willing and ready to give it her all. When we practiced at the CAC in the summer of 2006, in their dusty, sweltering back room, I noticed CHEAP never griped. She was just grateful to be skating.





The first time I actually saw CHEAP outside of work (and without skates on) was when I stopped by The Louisiana Pizza Kitchen in the French Quarter for dinner. First off, she looked downright gorgeous without a helmet on (not that she doesn’t look fetching with one on, but when you get accustomed to seeing someone in 90 degree weather in full gear it throws your perspective off). CHEAP, of course, greeted me and my friend with great spirit and promptly showed us how she kept The BERG schedule cards by her work station so she could hand them out to customers. “I talk derby up as much as possible,” she proclaimed. If you knew CHEAP, you couldn’t help but notice her natural ease and charm with people, but it was the first time I witnessed it outside of our derby group. Customers of all backgrounds came into the restaurant and greeted her like a long lost friend. They asked what station she was working in so they could sit where she was. I could over hear her chatting with them, talking about derby, and frequently pointing me out to her customers as another “derby sister.” I was (and am) continually being impressed by CHEAP.




CHEAP, despite having a full-time job and going to school, was always willing to lend her valuable time to BERG. And she never complained. We were still in our beginning stage and every bit of help was crucial. Whether it was rockin’ the penalty wheel at One-Eyed Jacks for our very first fundraiser (not only did she “own” that wheel, but also gained a slew of new fans)




volunteering for a clean-up in City Park









washing cars to raise money





or lending her infectious personality to get up at 5AM to do a radio spot (The DJ was clearly taken with her, out of the number of skaters he saw at our press event, he specifically remembered her).





It was a no-brainer to elect her as out premier roller girl of the month.

As we got ready to prepare for our first bout, I shot CHEAP’s photo along with some other skaters for our bio page. The other skaters had it easier. Working in the August heat in New Orleans, I tried to keep the shoots as quick as possible. However, when CHEAP showed up, she attracted the immediate interest of children and animals. As always, CHEAP kept smiling.






When it came time to bout, CHEAP wowed everyone with her intense derby drive coupled with her admirable sense of fair play. She’s the first person to slam you down during a game and the first person to give you a hug afterward. And that belch….. well, it’s something you have to experience for yourself.

CHEAP THR!LL is loyal, dedicated to improving this world, hysterically funny and has this wicked kind of innocence that is so rare. To know her, is to love her. To get blocked by her on skates is to respect her. To count her as a friend, is to consider yourself very lucky.




















Unfortunately, roller derby has its risks. Earlier this month, CHEAP broke her leg in three places.



Even in the emergency room, she continually cracked jokes throughout her ordeal (even managing to pop off some vulgar witticisms).



But without insurance, it has left our dear CHEAP with a tremendous amount of medical bills (and you thought college was expensive).

So, please join us, all day, this Wednesday, January 31st at The Louisiana Pizza Kitchen in CHEAP THR!LL’s honor. In the French Quarter at 95 French Market Pl. Her employers have generously agreed to donate 25% of their profits that day for CHEAP! See, this is the kind of benevolence she inspires!



I have always loved LPK, hands down they make the best shrimp caesar salad in the city. To view their fabulous menu, go here.

LPK MENU

Come out, eat drink and don’t be cheap! You might even catch a fellow roller derby girl.




If you are unable to come out and enjoy some good food and drink, you can donate directly to CHEAP:



Donate to CHEAP

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT!!!

Labels: CHEAP

Sophie Nuke’Em to be Crowned 2007 Queen of the Krewe of Mystick Newcombus



Calling all Daughters and Friends of the Cosmic Acorn to the Mystick Krewe of Newcombus Festivity for the amusement of

SOPHIE NUKE’EM OF THE BIG EASY ROLLERGIRLS

FEATURING

”By Invitation Only

A film by Rebecca Snedeker about gender, race, and old-line Carnival traditions

Screenings at 5 p.m. & 8 p.m.

Ms. Snedeker will introduce the film and take questions following each screening.
King cake tasting at 6:30 – 8 p.m.
Mystick Newcombus Ritual 7 p.m.
Thursday, January 25th.
Newcomb College Center for Research on Women
Caroline Richardson Hall, Newcomb College Campus
Tulane University
Kindly RSVP 504-865-5238

Newcomb College

And in more news...

Catch Vandal O'Riley's OTHER alter-ego, Veve laRoux



Vandal O'Riley will make an appearance as Veve laRoux, Bingomistress extraordinaire at New Orleans BINGO!
January 26th and 27th at the CAC's Freeport McMarran Theatre, 900 Camp St.
8 p.m.
Tickets are $15-$20

"Downtown New Orleans' favorite game-show cabaret returns for a night of weird music, movies, and prizes. Their retro-flavor tunes and showmanship recall a simpler time (when folks were totally nuts, it seems)." - Spin Magazine.

For more information go to:

The Bingo Show

WE HOPE TO SEE YOU OUT TO SUPPORT OUR LOVELY LADIES!

Labels: Bingo Show, Sophie Nuke 'Em, Vandal O'Riley

THE BIG EASY ROLLERGIRLS WANT YOU…

to design their next t-shirt!

The winner will receive two tickets to each of our 3 remaining bouts, including our championship, and our rematch with Las Vegas. You will also receive, of course, a free t-shirt!

The Rules

1. You can submit as many designs as you like.
2. It must include the words, “Big Easy Rollergirls.”
3. It must be one color image in the form of a jpeg or pdf at 300 dpi.


The Big Easy Rollergirls’ art committee will choose from 3 of the submissions and then the entire league will vote.

You can submit your design to: galaxygrrl@bigeasyrollergirls.com

The Deadline is February 16th, so hurry it up!

Scared? Feeling nervous? Intimidated, perhaps?

-That’s impossible. Even for a computer.
-It’s not impossible. I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home, they’re not much bigger than two meters.

MAY THE BERG BE WITH YOU!

Labels: T-shirt design

What could be greater than a confrontation of vice vs. vice? On January 12th, The Big Easy Rollergirls descended on Las Vegas, making roller derby history for New Orleans, when they embarked on their first inter league play against the Sin City Rollergirls as members of the Women's Flat Track Derby League.

The roster included:
Captain: Cherry Pi
Co-Captain: Bessie Smithereens
Team Manager: CHEAP THR!LL
Team: Crusty McKnuckle
Jaws
Little Mascara
Mace M. Dixon
Marquee de Squad
Trixie la Femme
Sophie Nuke ‘Em
Victoria Von Doom
Ibeatya Amber
Wit Vicious
Shay Bay
Refs: Henry Roll-ins & Beatrix sKiddo
Announcers: Nutty McGillacuddy & Right Reverande Psych Ward
Merch/PR: SmasHer


Buck Wild, who was unable to attend because of a family emergency, was greatly missed. The Big Easy Rollergirls and crew send her their warmest wishes.

With their skate bags in one hand, and airline tickets in the other, The Big Easy Rollergirls generated interest before their flight even took off. By the time the plane landed, the rollergirls had a whole new legion of fans. But, a lot of that can be contributed to the irresistible charm of Trixie la Femme and the interest peaked by McGillacuddy’s top hat.

After an unusually long wait for their luggage and the mysterious disappearance of their rental vans (the delays only made them homesick) BERG met up with the Sin City Rollergirls at a local bar for pizza.



Despite a crowded flight, numerous delays, freezing cold weather AND being in a sports bar, all of BERG abstained from drinking (albeit the announcers and PR, who were not under the same stringent training regime).


Once at their hotel, Fitzgerald’s, Bessie and Mascara kicked off their inaugural trip by gambling, and winning! Taking this as a sign of their guaranteed victory, the girls trekked to their rooms amidst miles of flashing lights and ringing bells and settled in for the night.


Mascara celebrates!


Bessie blows for good luck

The next morning, these Southern Belle Bombshells, not used to the cold, went on a desperate search for warmer clothes. Vegas’s cold front was an anomaly and most stores were sold out of gloves, hats and scarves. Crusty, the glove goddess, sought out and found gloves for almost the entire team.

Meanwhile, Marquee, Wit, Shay, SmasHer, Sophie, Jaws and Henry Roll-ins went to captains, Ivanna S. Pankin and Trish the Dish’s house for spagetthi breakfast (yes, you read correctly, spaghetti for breakfast) and for a possible shake down of inside information (which, sadly did not happen, but they did get to admire all of their cool derby posters). Afterward, these lucky rollergirls got to experience what only most rollergirls dream of- the backroom of a skate shop. Ivanna and Trish, co-owners of Sin City Skates, opened up their store for BERG, to which BERG took full advantage.





Beatrix finds a new friend



Marquee in a state of bliss


Shay can't believe her good fortune




Jaws and her glorious booty

Later that day, in the 30-degree temperature, Big Easy and Sin City gathered at the outdoor track, Flamingo Banks, for their skate showdown.




von Doom


Marquee gets ready to talk some trash


Mace

A small but faithful crowd of fans gathered. Big Easy had an impressive turnout. Wit had fans from New Orleans, Cherry Pi and Crusty from Los Angeles, Trixie from San Diego (her cousin, a fellow roller derby babe, Atom Eve from The San Diego Derby Dolls – must run in the family). Other derby girls from Reno came out to see BERG play.











Crusty's mom & friend!







The Las Vegas team played three periods of twenty minutes. Cherry Pi was injured in the first period and had to sit out the rest of the game. Ibeatya Amber was injured in the third period and had to sit out the remainder. Sophie Nuke ‘Em took some really hard blows and kept on playing. Little Mascara stepped up and subbed for Cherry and Ibeatya, with Mace, von Doom and Shay filling in as well. Bessie delivered some hard hits that sent some of Sin City’s finest into the crowds. Shay did a superlative job of controlling the pack. Wit, as usual, skated “in the zone” and Mace earned new fans with the crowd chanting, “She blocks, she hits, she jams; is there nothing Mace can’t do?”




Cherry & Ivanna






von Doom shoulders a hit from Trish


Ms. Kitt Fisto


Marquee


Mace sprints ahead


Cherry lends a hand to Ibeatya






Trixie


Sophie breaks from the pack!






Wit & Bessie block


Trixie flies away


Wit goes after Kitt


Crusty & Pirate bump shoulders




Shay keeps them back


Bessie & Wit share the penalty box






Beatrix keeps her eye on the game






Bruce Killie & Mascara battle it out


von Doom works the pack

The announcers did a fabulous job of keeping the crowd informed and in stitches. Evidently, it is a rarity in Vegas to see a man in a top hat and another in a linen suit tossing beads (you would think that wouldn’t be that rare).





The Reverande

Team Manager, CHEAP TR!LL stated it was a beautiful show of derby sister love when Trixie used her teeth to tear open Mascara’s leggings to examine her rink rash.
CHEAP calls the plays



Despite BERG’s valiant effort, Sin City’s lethal combination of incredibly hard hits from Pirate, impressive booty blocking from Go Go Distrukito, pivoting from Trish and Ivanna, and killer jamming from Bruce Killis, Kit Fisto and Pearly Gates, Sin City spanked the vice out of the Big Easy Girl 192-63. Yet, with Sin City’s infinite knowledge, they had the foresight to award Trixie la Femme MVP for her uncanny ability to disappear into a pack and emerge from the other side.



BERG & Sin City Share the Love!




After the game, despite being bruised and barely thawed, they had a brief interlude at a local bar and then The Big Easy Rollergirls' main mission was to cheer on their home team, the Saints.


Henry Roll-ins


Ibeatya


Shane & Wit


CHEAP helps out Bruce Killis


CHEAP obliges a fan


Bessie & Beatrix


Trish, Ivana, Captain Cherry & MVP Trixie

Cherry, Jaws, Beatrix, Bessie, Ibeatya, Trixie, Mascara, Bessie, McGillacuddy & the Reverande descended upon Caesar’s Palace. After the Saints victory, the crew second-lined out of Caesar’s to the tune of “Oh when the Saints (when the Saints) Go marching in (go marching in).” They accomplished two impressive feats: 1. Leaving the Philly fans speechless. 2. Shutting down the card games. The dealers were so terrified of our rowdy rollergirls that they actually held their cards.





Meanwhile, Mace, von Doom, Sophie, SmasHer & Henry caught the game at The Golden Nugget, equally silencing the fans with their already hoarse voices and unbridled vivacity.


The 4 Queens: Sophie, von Doom, Mace, SmasHer


Mace celebrates




Afterward, The Big Easy Girls and Sin City Girls met up at Hogs & Heifers for a celebration consisting of drinking and dancing ( in and on unusual places). Unfortunately, due to the Big Easy Rollergirls strict PG-13 rating, none of these photos are eligible for posting. (Many of the Big Easy Rollegirls are breathing easier because of this policy).

The next morning, BERG took advantage of their few hours left in the city of lights. Ibeatya, Beatrix, SmasHer, Reverande, Henry, von Doom & CHEAP took in the 2,000 hand-blown glass flowers – the Flori di Como- by Dale Chihuly and lovely promenade at The Bellagio and then enjoyed a walk on the strip to The Bodies Exhibition at the Tropicana.


Henry saves valuable time by shaving on The Strip




CHEAP & Ibeatya catch some zen


Ibeatya, Beatrix, Reverande, von Doom, Henry
CHEAP

Other BERG members took this time to socialize with Sin City girls or catch the football game.

While the Big Easy Rollergirls thoroughly enjoyed their visit to Las Vegas and were grateful for the hospitality of The Sin City Rollergirls, they were happy to be home and back in training for the rematch on their home turf, Saturday, May 19th.

Watch out Vegas, your luck will soon run out!

Come out this Saturday night and join The Big Easy Rollergirls in celebrating one of their favorite bands, The Tomatoes, cd release party at One Eyed Jacks - 615 Toulouse St. Also playing will be The Public and Gubernatorial Candidates. The rollergirls will have their infamous penalty wheel set up and in full swing. All of the proceeds go toward CHEAP THR!LL's medical bills. Get spanked by a rollergirl for a good cause! They will also have merch for sale, upcoming bout schedules, try-out information and details on the official CHEAP THR!LL fundraiser happening at the Louisiana Pizza Kitchen, January 31st.

Where else this weekend can you listen to some great live music, help a worthy cause and purchase some fantastic cds? All the while trying to procure a dance with your favorite rollergirl (on or off skates!).

The party starts at 9PM. Tickets are only $7.




Why go to Chicago when you can hang with the rollergirls in The Big Easy?

On Sunday, January 21st, come cheer on The Saints with your other favorite local sports team, The Big Easy Rollergirls! 1PM at Lucky's on 1625 St. Charles Ave. No cover charge!!! Skates are optional.

GO SAINTS.... AND GO BIG EASY ROLLERGIRLS!

In the spirit of the holidays, The Big Easy Rollergirls celebrated their last intraleague bout of 2006 in full holiday regalia. On December 16th, Santa’s Little Sleigher and The Tannenbombers vied for the Glory in Excelsis Derby at
Mardi Gras World.



Santa's Little Sleighers


The Tannenbombers


The Refs aka "The Fun Police"


The Announcers

With the anticipation at an all-time high for this saturnalia skirmish, Santa’s Little Sleigher’s took the rink dressed in fetching red and white outfits to a special mix from MC Trachiotomy featuring jingling bells and Slayer. Many of the Sleigher’s tossed out candy canes, glow sticks, ornaments and t-shirts to the crowd.


Little Mascara


Trixie la Femme


Vandal O'Riley

The Tannenbombers, dressed in camouflage, took the rink second with impressive military precision (let’s see the Marines do that on skates) to Pink Floyd’s “The Wall Part 2.” The Tannenbombers tossed out miniature army men with parachutes, airplanes and grenedae squirt guns.





Mace M. Dixon


Jaws

As always, many fans showed support for their favorite teams by wearing the teams’ colors.


Bad Santas









They were also thrilled to notice some fresh meat on the rink:


Beatrix sKiddo (Sleighers),


Ibeatya Amber (Sleighers)


Lt. Dan (Tannenbombers) were all making their debut bout.

One young fan named Beatrice was especially pleased when she discovered her favorite ref (Beatrix sKiddo) was now a full-fledged roller derby girl. Her loyalties quickly switched from cheering for the refs to cheering for SLS.

Fans were equally excited to welcome back Guest AnnouncerGingersnap and Guest Refree Hambone from The Gotham Girls Roller Derby. They returned to NOLA because they wanted some more of that Big Easy fun that only New Orleans’ roller derby has to offer.



The Enchanting Gingersnap


The Hardcore Hambone

Once the teams took their respective sides of the rink and the crowd sang “You are my sunshine” the Big Easy Rollergirls surprised one of their premier volunteers, Glenn May by singing “Happy Birthday” to him. Glenn, who was appropriately performing another selfless act by filming the bout, waved down atop of one of the Mardi Gras Float to HIS roller derby fans.


Volunteer extraordinaire, Glenn May

The first half of the game was an aggressive display of defense. Each team fought for their points. By halftime, SLS were ahead by two little “Christmas Wish Points” with a score of Tannenbombers 29 and Santa’s Little Sleighers 31.


Vandal & Mace


Buck, Bruise & Sugar


BeAtch & Ibeatya


Shay puts a blocking move on Trixie


Wit & Bessie


Crusty & Mascara battle for the lead


During half-time, The Vettes rocked Mardi Gras World while fans dined on Juan’s Flying Burrito and Slice Pizza. Vespa and Ruthie the Duck Girl took a spin on the rink tossing out candy canes to the crowd.







The second period was even fiercer than the first. Each point was a battle.


Cherry tries to block The Tannenbombers


Scabby & Buck


CHEAP slams into Scabby


Ruffit holds them back


Shay gives Scabby a hand


Cherry & von Doom

Unfortunately, there are causalities in every battle and this occasion was without exception.







Bruise Springsteen of SLS, who had recently recovered from a broken kneecap, took a bad spill. Down, but not out, Bruise was forced to cut back on some of her playing time. Ruffit, Ibeatya and Beatrix stepped in to cover some of her jams.

Kelkat from SLS took a bad crash on her knees and was forced to sit out.



Marquee de Squad, from the Tannenbombers, in an effort pass Cherry Pi on the outside and protect her jammer, was delivered a crushing blow that sent Marquee to the ground and Cherry Pi to the penalty box. Marquee had to sit out a couple of jams but was quickly back in the action letting her presence be known on the rink.


But by far, the most devastating injury was when Power Snatch took a savage spill. Crawling off the track, Power Snatch sat in the inner circle. There she monitored the game and called out encouragement and instructions to her team. It wasn’t until the end of the bout that it was discovered that the mighty captain of Santa’s Little Sleighers had broken her ankle.



Despite all the injuries to their team, Santa’s Little Sleighers put up a valiant fight, but in the end were defeated by The Tannenbombers 63 to 56.

Trixie la Femme of SLS was the lead scorer with 31 Points. Scoring an impressive 55% of her team’s points. WoW!


"Yo, I'm the lead scorer, y'all.

Scabby followed with 18


"Hmmm, it feels good to score 18 points."

and Wit Vicious with 14.


Yay, 14 points!

Buck Wild, slamming her way to notoriety, made her debut on the Vicious Vixen Chart with a whooping 16 penalties.



Cherry Pi was right behind her with 15, while Bessie rounded out the top three with 13. Forearms and elbows seemed to be these ladies (?) weapons of choice.


Cherry Pi


Bessie

To give credit to the “good girls” Kelkat of SLS finished the bout without any penalties!


Kelkat, the ultimate good girl

Crusty McKnuckle of The Tannenbomers and Ibeatya Amber of SLS each earned one. See, good girls can finish first!


Crusty keeps it clean


"Oh my gosh, only one penalty!"

Afterward, everyone gathered at The Old Point Bar in Algiers for an evening (that stretched into the morning) of dancing, drinking, laughing, playing “Spank the Believer,” and.....





















































TO SHARE THE LOVE!

































The Big Easy Rollergirls would also like to thank everyone who so generously donated to their Holiday Décor and Toy Drive benefiting the Common Ground and The Arabi Wrecking Krewe. Your donations brought many smiles to families in need. Crusty McKnuckle, who served as the liaison for The Common Ground, stated she was overwhelmed by the outpouring from the community.

A special Big Easy Rollergirl thank-you to:
Santa’s Quarters

Vespa

The mystery man who dropped off FIVE very large garbage bags full of toys at Tommy Crane Group Realty.

Michael Cain of Mercury Injection And Jim Vella of Vella Vetrofor donating many beautiful hand-blown glass ornaments.

Shiek from The Arabi Wrecking Krewe for helping to organize and distribute the decorations.

Betty Cash, who instead of a Christmas gift from her son, asked that he make a donation in her name to The Common Ground and The Arabi Wrecking Krewe. Betty, you have the heart of a rollergirl.

The New Orleans' Blogger Community for getting the word out.

We would also like to recognize the NO/AIDS Task Force for coordinating their annual Holiday Wishes program, and to all the rollergirls and their families who VERY generously contributed to help make the holidays a little better for three families affected by HIV/AIDS.

We hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season.



Thank you New Orleans. We love you and look forward to even a better bouting year in 2007!



And for those of who have requested the infamous I Heart Snatch t-shirts, you can email Power Snatch personally at: powersnatch@cox.net for more information.

Due to The Big Easy Rollergirls staunch support of the Saints (and perhaps a
karmic apology for our debut bout featuring “The ‘Aints”) we are
rescheduling our January 21st bout to accommodate the Saints’ playoff game.
We don’t want our fans to make the arduous task of choosing between two of
the greatest sports teams this city has to offer.

To accommodate the loss of the January date, The Big Easy Rollergirls have
added an additional date: May 19th, 7PM at Blaine Kern’s Mardi Gras World,
when we will host the Sin City Rollergirls in what will no doubt be a
vicious rematch of the two leagues’ all-star teams.

The remaining schedule, time and venue will be the same:
March 24th and April 22nd. Ticket holders who have already purchased tickets
will be reimbursed through Brown Paper Tickets.

The Big Easy Rollergirls would like to thank everyone in advance for their
continual support in making New Orleans’ only all-female, flat-track roller
derby a growing success. To contact us, visit:
Big Easy Rollergirls

GO SAINTS!

AND,

GO BIG EASY ROLLERGIRLS!

Thank you for your patience while we work on our gallery page. Meanwhile, enjoy these pictures from some of our past bouts and events, and keep checking back for more links and updates.

December Bout by Muttzshotz

December Bout by SmasHer

Big Easy Rollergirls' XXXmas Party

November Bout by Muttzshotz

November Bout by SmasHer

Hall of Pain


If you have photos you would like to submit, please send them to smasher@bigeasyrollergirls.com

Kelkat: It was a tough game in terms of injuries (pre-existing and new ones) and our team didn’t let that get us down. We pulled it together, did our best and still gave them a damn good bout.
It was wonderful seeing our newest team members enjoy their first bout and hearing about their perception of it afterward. We’re lucky to have new and great talent.












Crusty McKnuckle: Fav moment of the bout… After the seeing ALL THE TOYS that people donated (I have the Sheriff’s hat that someone donated on right now). I can’t wait to bring them to Common Ground. I hope we’re able to make the holidays a little better for some kids. Out players and fans are very generous people!
I almost forgot… A close second was watching Cherry chase BeAtch through streets in front of the Old Point because she was smoking a cigarette. Good times!








CHEAP THR!LL: This bout was so much FUN! We were all in good spirits and enjoying ourselves. My favorite moment was the time Shay tried to slow me down on the line by booty-blocking me. I was right up on her and although I wasn’t actually touching her she kept yelling at me to get off her back. Hambone skated up and told her to watch her elbows! She was pissed! I laughed so hard…
It also meant a lot when Hambone came up to me and told me that I had really cleaned up my game, hardly getting any penalties. Ah, the hard work pays off!
I LOVED having Ginger Snap and Hambone back! They add so much.



Ginger Snap


Hambone
During halftime we were strategizing in the back and I thought something was on fire because I could see smoke. It took me a minute to realize that it was steam!







Mel: Two small but big fans…
One little girl, named Beatrix, was looking for a picture of her favorite referee in the program and was very disappointed not to find her in the ref photos, until she discovered that Beatrix sKiddo has joined a team and would be skating as a Sleigher!
Two other girls were running and chasing each other after the bout, and as one passed the other, she shouted triumphantly shouted, “I’m Cherry Pi!”







Pontchartrain BeAtch: One of my favorite moments was when two of my players, who were seated in the team section, were “not” sassing the refs about a call, and Lionel skated by and seamlessly gave them penalties along with all the other penalties he was calling on the girls who were actually skating! It was sooo funny!
It is also a proud moment when you can land a good hit and knock someone down right in front of your mom. A nice little mommy present for Christmas.








Beatrix sKiddo: Do I have to pick one? I loved every minute of it!
One moment especially sticks in my mind. We were lining up on the track some time in the second half and I hear, for probably about the 3rd time, “Beatrix… Penalty Box!” I must have slumped my shoulders and hung my head as I went to the box because when I got there I got the most sympathetic look from The Countess! I miss you Zebras, but it’s so much fun being a rollergirl!










Diamond Grrrl: So many moments made this bout a great one.
Bout setup is getting faster so it was mellower morning than the usual and it permitted us time to gab at Pho Tau Bay before getting ready.
The outfit reveal is my favorite time… Scabby always has the best costumes!


Scabby, once again wins best costume!

Working with Lionel and our newbie refs was a great time. Lionel has entered his role as a Jammer Ref seamlessly. He’s a total badass.
Seeing Power Snatch being rolled on a dolly cart to her car and her caring more about showing off the new bag she was given than whatever had happened to her ankle! That’s spirit!







The Countess: Favorite moments: Seeing our ex-Zebras (Lt. Dan and Beatrix sKiddo) doing us proud (and Ibeatya Amber, too). Congrats on losing your virginity, girls!
Teaching new Zebras!
All the TOUGH ladies we have the honor of refereeing! The whole bout, no one gave in, no one stayed down after a slamming fall, no one stopped working strategy, no one slowed up, no one hesitated to lie on a block… NO ONE can beat MY rollergirls. Vegas beware--- hell and high water have nothing on these women!!!











Marquee de Squad: I spent a little time at the party to a man the finer points of derby being simultaneously offensive and defensive. He gave me a grave look and said, “That Cherry Pi is a bad motherfu#@*%!” I agreed.
I anticipated a tough game. I knew The Sleighers would take The Tannenbombers to the mat, and I was not disappointed. It was rough stuff. I was proud of my league.












Bruise Springsteen: So many…
Finding out that I can push myself farther to do better and go faster than I ever thought possible.
Buck & Scabby’s jammer race. It was an incredible display of derby strategy. Way to go, Buck!



Hearing people yell, “BRUUUUUUUISE!!! during my intro.
Being told afterward that I yelled, “F@*k you!” at BeAtch during a jam. Oops!











Little Miss Ruffit: My favorite moment was the whole night! Maybe it’s just the season or something, but the camaraderie in the league was full on. And everyone was so damn cute. Getting a professional spinal adjustment during halftime was sweet, too.
My two proudest moments were when Bruise asked me to sub for her and Wit told me after the bout that I was impossible to get around.











Anti ‘Em: I knew it was going to be a fun bout when before the first period ever got going we had a referee race and Hambone kicked all our butts! Still, I’m convinced that I would have beat his Gotham butt if only my toe stop hadn’t slipped on the track! At least Henry gave him a run for his money.
It was a really good bout all around (although I hate seeing our ladies get hurt!) and it’s really satisfying to see how much the league improves every time they play. Skaters on both teams were hitting hard and skating better than ever. Look out, Vegas!









Power Snatch: I loved that so many of our fans came out on the weekend before Christmas to see our festive finery. Also, seeing and feeling the improvement of everyone was amazing. Wit was flying around the outside of the corners… which is wicked difficult to do and get in front of the pack. maSCARa hit like Charles Grant while looking like a petite flower.



maSCARa shows petite flowers aren't to be messed with!

Bruise, Kelkat & Marquee fought through some bad knee falls to keep pushing for their teams. The defense of this bout was amazing, and the jammers ability to work through it was inspiring.
The ultimate favorites—
1. Finding the strength to crawl off the track when I was injured so the jam could keep going. We needed every second of playing time to try for the victory.
2. Seeing Blonde in the second period just put on her most serious determined face and skate the hell out of the track.
3. Skating with Ibeatya and Beatrix in their first bout and seeing them ROCK it, especially when they had to double time and skate their own positions and sub for me.

Beatrix sKiddo & Ibeatya Amber

4. Hearing Ginger Snap tell us that she can’t believe we were the same league she saw in September because everything had improved so much! And her agreement that we have more than a chance to beat the socks off Sin City! Yeah, baby….











Illegally Blonde: My favorite moment was lining up on the wrong side of the track during the second period. I was standing there with my jammer panty on wondering where everyone was until Em came and got me.














Trixie la Femme: I always look forward to seeing what the white team is going to come up with for their intro. I dug their march on skates, all dressed in green camo (except Scabigail, of course!) to Pink Floyd. It looked so cool and made the fans happy. Their fancy footwork would be a great drill.



The Tannenbomber's Entrance


This was a terrific game and I had fun all night. Favorite game moment for me: Coming up behind Bessie who was sharking as a three or four blocker and doing a GREAT job of looking behind her. I couldn’t help grinning at her as we headed into a match of wits and timing, and I thought how much I love this game.


A lick instead of a hit

Hardest hit of the night came from Mace, who sent me flying into Tom, Jaw’s boyfriend, who was volunteering on the sidelines. He graciously offered me a hand up. Hey, is that allowed? ☺
I love the fact that we don’t have enough chairs for all our teammates to sit down. Yay, Ibeatya and Beatirx! It was wonderful looking over and seeing you guys in our pack!











Lt. Dan: Wow… I just can’t stop saying that…wow!
Fav moments… doing yoga before the bout with Bessie. Stretching, breathing, laughing our butts off at people would get quiet as they’d pass by us. Also, all the genuine compliments from my peers! I heart all of you soooo much!!!!! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!














Henry Roll-ins: Watching my refs step up to the challenges of their new position and kick ass at them: Lionel was precise, accurate, and fast as a motherf’ckr as a jammer ref; Mel was so intently focused on watching the pack and communicating the penalties that he didn’t even realize he was skating better and faster than ever. Colonel Panic was an absolute meticulous badass as penalty keeper on his first day in stripes, and I’ve never been more confident in the accuracy of our scoring than I was with Diamond Grrrl and Countess and our new recruits backing them up.
Having Hambone around – he’s one of the best dam refs in the country, a great mentor and a super guy all around- it’s always an honor and a pleasure to work (and play) with him and ginger Snap.
Seeing Bruise and Snatch pull themselves off the track despite their injuries so that we didn’t have to stop the jam. Proud to work with you tough ladies.
Watching our former referees, Lt. Dan and Beatrix, kick ass for both teams, where they belong – as rollergirls. Don’t look back, y’all!
Watching the best derby playing I’ve seen out of our teams yet! There packs were faster and tighter than ever, and the hardest, most stinging hits I saw all night were 100% legal. You guys rock!










Dynamite Dwalin’: My favorite moment was looking to the right of the penalty box to see VVD holding Snatch’s hand while she was bravely bearing a broken ankle. That embodied the whole spirit of the bout to me--- everyone did a great job of enjoying the vigorous competition, but came together when it was needed, whether it was comforting someone on the opposite team who was injured or taping cracks on the floor or giving directions to the “secret” bathroom. I think the league is quickly developing a really cool combination of being able to be fiercely competitive but reaming friends and camaraderies---- sweet!











Sophie Nuke ‘Em: Finding out that Ginger Snap and Hambone were going to be at the bout.


Ginger Snap & Hambone

My son, Alex getting on one of the announcer microphones, and cheering for The Sleighers. Now the other derby kids (Liam, Cassidy, Riley, Sean, Robyn, Jake, who am I forgetting?) need a turn!
Seeing how well the new skaters did—Dan, Ibeatya and Beatrix are, to quote Scabby, “the r0x0rz. Eleven!”










Victoria von Doom: I think December has been my favorite bout thus far. After the opening whistle on the first jam, my slightly stressful day melted away. Having recently watched the video from our early days of skating, I took a few moments to happily observe the league’s improvement.
Then came the after party: Frida Pancakes and her new Christmas tradition (Spank the Believer) SmasHer and her camera, Bessie and her mad hot dancing, and the shot of Jameson with some of my favorite derby people (No Irish Carbombs this time!)




von Doom with the creator of "Spank the Believer"









Bessie Smithereens: Anti Em’s pancakes…mmm. Not driving…mmm. Dancing…mmm. Watching Wit fly…mmm. Hard to choose.


Wit has wings!















Shay-Bay: My favorite part was realizing how much I love my team. We have fun working together. My second favorite part was winning. Sorry, but it’s true.















Wit Vicious: Having everyone play their hearts out for the whole game, including our new girls.
Jammer race.
Talking to one of the security guards and hearing how much his little son enjoyed all of this. Adorable!
Having such support both on and off the track.
My very minor “battle scars”… I feel so hardcore…though not nearly as hardcore as Snatch, Bruise, and Marquee… damn, ladies, y’all are tough!










Colonel Panic: The first beer after the bout.
Not that the bout was rough, but you always want a beer the most when you’re not supposed to have one.

















SmasHer: Many favorite moments.
Seeing the skirt Dynamite Dwalin’ made for me. She’s the best and is always so good to me.
Flashing my “Get Shay” underwear at Shay for the first time and hear her exclaim, “No way!” Although I would have much rather preferred, “Golly, no fricking way. My goodness!” Maybe next time…



Setting up the track with Alex, Sophie Nuke ‘Em’s son, and have him constantly interrupt me to tell me how his mom was basically the best roller derby player in the world and how lucky we are to have her. It was very school yard, “My mom is better than your mom.” Also how he said that his mom said that I REALLY wanted him to speak on the microphone (Sophie, of course, was oblivious to all of this conversation) and as a favor to me he would consent to do it. So it was great to set it up with the announcers and hear him yell out, “Go Sleighers!” I also enjoyed listening to his roller derby conspiracy theories. He makes bout setup go much quicker.
Eating at Pho Tau Bay with about a dozen of us before the bout (I swear, Henry Roll-ins secretly digs his “guy only” status at many of these gatherings).
Watching Glenn’s face when we sang, “Happy Birthday” to him.
Having people from my work get up and scream my name when I skated by, although, I was slightly embarrassed because I still can’t compete yet. Wait until March!
My least favorite moments were:
The injuries from our BERG ladies.
Discovering that one of my dearest and oldest friends, Frida Pancakes, made up the new after-bout tradition game, “Spank the Believer” and I wasn’t even there to participate. That’s what I get for leaving early (?) AND for accidentally forgetting to drive Frida home. Sorry!


Frida Pancakes & SmasHer: the force is with them!